Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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