Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
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