i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize