There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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