i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
