Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
vagina is talking i cant
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
