i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
