Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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