My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
