Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
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