Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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