She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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