that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
