so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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