Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize