you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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