So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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