Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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