he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
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We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
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They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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