you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
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