This girl is more easily done than said...
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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