I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
this just has baby written all over it
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
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