she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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