How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
