you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
