Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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