Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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