too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
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there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
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I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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