Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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