What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
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i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
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Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
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