R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
