"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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