McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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