you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
