Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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