Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
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