Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
