Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
