he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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