If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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