did you get engaged???
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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