I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Randomize
