Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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