My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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