What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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