i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
ok first of all what the fuck
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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