what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
People with herpes should wear stickers.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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