I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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