quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Randomize
