i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
