So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
